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Dr. Neil Clark Warren, founder of eHarmony, offers essential information allowing singles to immediately gauge whether a prospective mate is truly compatible, avoid the emotional pain of spending years with the wrong person, and be confident that the love they've found will last.
- Sales Rank: #106099 in Books
- Brand: FaithWords/Hachette Book Group
- Published on: 2005-12-13
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.00" h x .75" w x 5.31" l, .50 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 256 pages
Amazon.com Review
Dr. Neil Clark Warren is the mastermind behind eHarmony.com—an Internet matchmaking service that encourages readers to find "true love" rather than a slew of Saturday night dates. His basic shtick is that "broad-based compatibility" is the glue for making a partnership loving and lasting. Falling in Love offers 29 "dimensions of compatibility" to consider before committing to a romantic relationship. His formula is so, well, formulaic, it threatens to take all the mysticism and romance out of finding a soul mate. That’s fine with Warren, who believes that readers who screen partners for compatibility will fare much better than spirit-struck lovers who base commitments on profound immediate attraction.
Warren begins with weeding out bad characters. "If one of the partners in a relationship lies, cheats, or steals, that bad character will eventually undermine the relationship." Even if you’re not the victim of these behaviors, you will be, claims Warren. So run, don’t walk from the relationship. Seems like obvious common sense. Yet advice columnist are constantly answering letters from unhappily married men and women, complaining about these very forms of broken trust. Warren also encourages readers to stop ignoring the early "red flags" of addictive personalities and psychological issues, such as chronic depression. Demand that the partner commit to professional help before you go any further with the relationship, he advises. Other compatibility issues include anger management, sexual passion, and family planning.
While his advice is solid, it is conservative. For instance, he does not address homosexual love or allow homosexual partnering on his web site. Also, most of the discussion is geared toward traditional marriage as the final goal. --Gail Hudson
From Publishers Weekly
If you’re looking for your soul mate, you’ve probably heard of eHarmony.com, the online dating service founded by psychotherapist Warren and which he claims has resulted in 2,000 marriages. Here he shares the eHarmony.com formula, which consists of 29 personal dimensions that Warren says determine whether two people are compatible; they range from the obvious, like intellect, sense of humor and character, to more nuanced qualities like one’s sense of curiosity and level of artistic passion. Warren evaluates how important each dimension is (e.g., "Most people with strong artistic bents simply must be paired with partners who have similar interests") and how they can affect a relationship. Warren offers real-life stories to show how these dimensions play out in relationships, describing, for instance, the tensions created by mismatched energy levels, when one partner is full of get-up-and-go and the other is a couch potato. Warren’s dimensions of compatibility will ring true to those seeking not just a hot romance but a stable, long-term relationship.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
About the Author
Dr. Neil Clark Warren, founder of eHarmony, has counseled thousands of singles and married couples, and has become one of America's best-known experts on singles' issues, mate selection, and developing healthy relationships. His articles have appeared in numerous journals and magazines, and he has appeared on more than 3,000 radio and television programs, such as Oprah, CNBC, CNNFN and Focus on the Family.
Most helpful customer reviews
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
How To Find The Right Person For You.It Starts With This Book.
By Chris Sellick
What a gem of a book. I had just finished reading the author's book "Date Or Soul Mate?" and I saw this other book and I had to have it.Both books should be bought together. If you are single,divorced or whatever,you should read this book first. It makes you realise why some relationships fail and why some work.
This book will show you why we need to be selective when looking for love.Its about finding the right one and eliminating the wrong ones.
This book explains the 29 dimensions of compatibility.You need to read all about those,its a real wake up call. The author explains everything to you.I love his advice.I love the way he communicates his ideas.Its something we all need to do to see where we went wrong and how to get it right and why. He gives examples of everything.Its brilliant reading.
I recommend you buy this book first ,"Falling In Love For All The Right Reasons" and then the author's book "Date Or Soul Mate?" too. You will see that there's also some promoting of eHarmony.com in both books. Between these 2 books it will open your eyes to see there's a better world for your future relationships.I would recommend you read this book first," Falling In Love For All The Right Reasons", then read the author's book: "Date Or Soul Mate?" . Both books are ideal together.Its worth the effort.
Date or Soul Mate?: How to Know if Someone is Worth Pursuing in Two Dates or Less
Are You the One for Me?: Knowing Who's Right and Avoiding Who's Wrong
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
a further look at eHarmony -- in a book!
By Frank Carpenter
I would consider this a follow-up or sequel to Dr. Warren's book Date or Soul Mate?
While Date or Soul Mate? could be a basic introduction to eHarmony, Falling in Love for All the Right Reasons takes us into more details regarding eHarmony's 29 Dimensions of Compatibility.
Again, eHarmony is about compatibility -- the more compatible you are with your intended, the happier you will be, the greater chance of success you will have in your relationship.
Chapter 1 is a history of how eHarmony began.
Chapter 2 is an introduction to the remainder of the book.
There is a chapter devoted to each of the 29 Dimensions of Compatibility.
There is a chapter on Chemistry, and another chapter on Commitment.
If you have wondered about eHarmony's 29 Dimensions of Compatibility, this is the book form (as opposed to joining eHarmony) which will explain those Dimensions.
From what I understand from the final "chapter" "How eHarmony Works," we should be able to join eHarmony in order to take advantage of its personality profile without having to pay for a membership. If I understand correctly, paid membership begins when you want to start meeting your soul mate.
Perhaps the most difficult part of this book is taking an honest look at yourself and where you currently are as opposed to whatever fantasy life you think you might prefer. I have a lot of work to do on myself before I can honestly be ready for someone new. Well, if I want the relationship to work, that is.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Get It!
By Davito
If you, or a loved one, are on the lookout for your better half I strongly encourage you to read this book and then pass it on to those you care about. A friend of mine picked up a copy of this book at a yard sale. She let me borrow it and within a few days I purchased my own copy of it here on Amazon. I'm married with 2 daughters, one of which recently got married, and let me tell you I WISH I HAD READ THIS BOOK WHEN IT WAS FIRST PUBLISHED! What an eye opener! No exaggeration. I'm the first one to be skeptical about a book on this subject but the author (you've seen him on TV) is DEAD ON with his insight of the subject. Do yourself a favor, skip lunch for one day then use the money to buy this book. I promise, you will not be disappointed.
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